Children don’t grow out of lying; they grow into it. So, teaching them to tell the truth is fundamental for their growth and development. Between the ages of 4 and 6, your child may often experiment with lying and telling the truth. This can put us parents in challenging situations, as they push the limits by fibbing about what happened at school or daycare. Children who have faced difficult experiences may go through this phase later, for a longer time, or with more intensity.
Why Do Children Lie?
Remember, there’s usually a motive behind your child’s dishonesty. It could be that they have an unspoken need that they struggle to communicate. It is possible that their actions are driven by a past event that instilled fear or a longing for recognition. As parents, this is our chance to connect with our child and understand the underlying need driving their behavior.
Encouraging Truth-Telling
Once you identify the underlying need, encourage your child to express themselves without lying. It can be tempting to ignore the lying out of frustration or exhaustion, but this won’t help them learn to tell the truth. Let your child know you want to work together and show them the benefits of being honest. When you see improvements and less lying, celebrate their progress. Praise them for their honesty and let them know how much you appreciate their trust. This validation will encourage more truth-telling.
Leading by Example
You’ve heard of “monkey see, monkey do” and your child is no different. They are always watching and learning from your actions and words. Setting a good example is one of the most important things you can do for them. Follow through on your promises, show kindness to others, and act with integrity.
Key Takeaway
Even during these challenging phases of lying, continue to love your child unconditionally, just as Christ loves us despite our faults.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
Application
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